June 15

Now of course, this kind of silly relationship drama is nothing new in my life. I've lived through several very tactless break-ups with this general group. This one just became annoying because Misha was in a bad mood, so he started clashing hard with Hunter, the other person who rents the space. Now, Yunie is already a little on the short side to begin with, but when Hunter and Misha are at each others' throats, kye can't help but join the fray. So by the time sunset rolled around, the three of them were intolerable to be around. Everyone aside from the three of them had left by the time I chose to sneak out too.

So, around sunset I found myself loitering about a block away from the Unnamed Studio, a brown bagged bottle full of some sort of wine (red, I think?) in one hand, and a cigarette in another. I wish I could say that this was an unusual occurrence, but it absolutely wasn't. In fact, mystery wine in a brown bag had become almost a Sunday night tradition.

So anyway, I was here hiding from the warfare going on in the studio, when I catch a glimpse of someone sauntering over. I don't recognize her at first, since we hadn't really talked that much. I notice she's walking directly toward me, so I avoid eye contact, staring dramatically down the road and trying to look cool.

"Hey" she said as she drew near. "Can I bum one?"

Without turning to face her, I pull out my pack of smokes and offer her one. I take a quick swig of my brown bag bottle, then finally turn to face her as I offer my lighter. I swear, at the time I really thought I was coming off very cool.

"Thanks" She said, lighting her cigarette and taking a long drag on it. As she handed my lighter back, I finally recognized her. It was Tara! I mean of course it was, I probably wouldn't have felt a need to write about this if it wasn't her. It was, quite possibly, the worst person to have run into out here.

"Oh hey. Tara, right?" I asked.

"Yeah. You're uhhh Misha's friend?"

I shook my head, ready to split hairs. "No, I'm really Yunie's friend, and kye's mostly Hunter's friend, and they're Misha's friend. So really Misha and I barely knew each other."

"Ah, well. Nice to meet you, even if it's a little late."

"Yeah, I heard about what happened there. Rough stuff."

"It's... fine. I don't know, it's my fault really."

I took an awkward swig of my wine, not really wanting to touch that one. "Want some?" I held the bottle out to her.

"What is it?"

"Wine."

"What kind?"

"Couldn't tell ya."

She chuckled and grabbed the bottle from my hand, taking a hearty swig before handing it back. "Wow that is... terrible."

I nodded. "Gets the job done though."

She laughed and leaned against the wall next to me, smoking her cigarette. We didn't really talk much from there, I would periodically hand her my bottle and she would take a drink, but otherwise interaction was minimal. When she finished her cigarette, she asked for another, and by the time she finished that one, the bottle was empty. She awkwardly wished me goodnight and went along her way.

Now, this doesn't seem like much, right? An awkward encounter getting lightly drunk with a friends' friends' ex, right? So why is she lingering in my mind so much? I wandered off and headed home almost immediately after she left, and that was so many hours ago. Still, I find myself re-analyzing every moment of our interaction, trying to work out if there was some subtext I missed. Was she flirting with me? Was she just having a bad day and wanted a smoke? Is she still thinking about me too?

I've been struggling to put into words what exactly it was about her that seemed to captivate me so much. Maybe it was her laugh, or just the fact that she was there at a vulnerable moment for me. Or maybe I just thought she was hot. It's really hard to say.