July 20th

I’m writing this in the evening, shortly after sundown. I don’t know exactly where I am, a park somewhere, presumably in or near Chicago.

”It’s weird” Tara had said to me, this morning. We had stopped at a diner here in the area for breakfast. It was fine, coffee was pretty good, doesn’t really live up to Mateo’s. More expensive too. Staff was friendly though, more pleasant than Winter most days honestly. “I never got along with my grandfather... but I still feel sad.”

She had opened up a little about this the night before too. I didn’t really want to stop and write about it at the time, I figured I owed her my full attention, all things considered. We did jump ahead several steps in our relationship very quickly, but that’s just how it goes with lesbians sometimes.

”Family’s weird like that.” I said, taking a sip of my coffee. My own family wasn’t something I really wanted to talk about, but luckily for me she didn’t ask.

”Yeeah.” She smiled at me, one of those sad, saggy eyed smiles. The timing of this little family problem definitely broke a few early walls, but it was pretty clear that she was still keeping her distance a bit. She would pause sometimes, averting her eyes just a little. Cadence often did something similar, and with Cadence, I knew every time she paused like that, she was thinking something she didn’t want to say. I could onlyN assume that was true for Tara too.

”What are you gonna say to him?” I asked. I hadn’t planned to ask that, it may have been a slightly weird thing to ask. It just sort of came out.

”I... don’t actually know.” She gave an awkward laugh, staring into her coffee. “I really don’t know what to say. Maybe just, goodbye.”

”I don’t know. It’ll probably come to you.”

She nodded, stirring her coffee anxiously. Around this point I started to get a little anxious myself, but I really didn’t want to show that. I wasn’t sure if I was making things worse or not. I was tring to support her, comfort her, and periodically distract her, but I worried that maybe I wold just be another stressor for her. I didn’t express this to her. I figured she was bound to witness my neuroses eventually, but I decided to push that can down the road a little.

Now, here I am, several hours later, alone in a random park I’ve never seen before, with a bagged bottle of cheap wine from some shithole down by the corner. I don’t think drinking in public like this is legal here, but hey, the couple two benches look like they’re smoking crack and I’m pretty sure some dudes are banging in the porto-potty, so I’m sure my transgression would be a low priority if cops rolled through.

Tara’s with her family at the moment. Shen met up with her mom and headed to the... hospital? Nursing home? Wherever her grandpa is. We all felt it was best to let this particular part just be family. Cadence offered for me to come wait at her hotel with Winter, and Winter gave me a glare that I think was saying “don’t do it, get lost” so I didn’t do it and I got lost.

I’m nervous, understandably. Not because of the couple doing crack, who am I to judge really. It’s mostly about Tara, obviously. Like, am I blowing it? We met, hit it off, I was awkard as fuck for like a week, then we railed each other for three days straight, now we’re two states over so she can say goodbye to her grandpa. I worry maybe I’ve been weird, maybe I’m making things hard on her. Maybe she doesn’t want me around anymore but feels guilty since I’ve been helping her.

Or, ya know, maybe things are fine between us and she’s just stressed because of the whole thing where her grandpa’s dying. That’s possible too.

I took a long swig on the swill in my bottle. I don’t remember the brand, it doesn’t matter, it was cheap. You don’t to prioritize quality when you’re brown bagging at city parks in Chicago at night. Well, at least I don’t.

I wonder what Yunie is up to right now. I consider calling kyr, venting for a little bit. I’m struggling to remember the timezone difference, it might be really late back in Last Light. The only person I’d be calling that late at the moment is, well, here in Chicago with me.

I think I’m gonna make my way back to the hotel. I wanna be awake when Tara gets back, but the day is catching up with me. A nap could do me good.

It’s now several hours later, and I’m still at the park. Tara messaged me not long after I was done writing earlier, and she told me that she was gonna be really late, so I decided to linger a little longer. But like, here I was, sitting on my little bench, when suddenly I look up and there’s Winter. Just standing in front of me, silently. Just kind of appeared, like a ghost.

”Funny seeing you here.” She said, sitting down next to me. “Though I guess it makes sense.”

”Well yeah, the hotel is right around the corner.”

”Yeah.” She reached into her pocket and pulled out a pack of cigarettes, Lucky Strike filterless. She put one in her mouth and held the pack out to me, and I mean it would have been rude to say no so I took one. I lit it myself, I wasn’t about to ask Winter Ritmo to light my cigarette for me.

”Believe it or not, I have a lot of history with this park.”

”Really?”

She nodded. “This is where I realized I was in love with Cadence.”

”... really?” It was a little hard to believe.

”Yeah. That’s actually why we stay at this hotel specifically. I like to come and reminisce when we find ourselves out here.”

”Awfully sentimental of you.” I whiffed.

”I’m a pretty sentimental person. I just don’t like to advertise it.”

”That’s fair. Still... weird place for you to have some big revelation about your wife. Though I assume you weren’t married yet?”

”No, we weren’t.” She took a drag on her cigarette, and, reflexively, I offered her my swill bottle. She took it, and took a decent swig, much to my surprise. I expected the heiress to wretch, but she seemed unbothered by it.

”I’m sorry it isn’t a cellar-grade noir.” I said, sarcastically, with a smile.

”I’ve drank plenty of corner store swill in my day, Dani.” She said, sternly.

I whiffed, and sat quietly for a moment. I decided not to ask her any more about her past, since she had already shared way more than I could have expected. “So how did you end up falling in love at a place like this?” My mouth asked, directly disobeying my brain.

”That’s a long story.”

”Tara’s gonna be late, I have time.”

Winter turned and looked at me, stone-faced, for several moments. “Okay.” She finally said. “Why not.”

I sat in shock as she told me the story. I mostly just listened, rarely asking a question or making a comment. I was genuinely surprised at how she opened up. She wasn’t terribly vulnerable or anything, but she did share a story from her past, which is way more than I usually get from her.

I’m not gonna share the story here. It isn’t my story to tell, and even if it was, it would be a pretty massive tangent. It did help ease my nerves for a moment, taking my mind off of Tara for a bit.

A notable takeaway though, Winter and Tara both having ties to Chicago isn’t actually a coincidence. It turns out, Winter is actually Tara’s sister!

Nah, not really. Winter’s company just hires a lot of people from Chicago, they have some amount of presence here since her actual sister lives here. Apparently Tara either works for, or used to work for, Winter’s family’s company, but I mean so does like half of Last Light.

Not exactly a massive twist, and the story i general wasn’t really any sort of earth-shattering revelation, but it was still pretty nice getting a bit of insight into someone I knew very little about.

...

...

Am I a quick little fling to Tara or is this like the real deal?